My heart is heavy over the pain you've endured. The news of your husband's unfaithfulness and your decision to divorce is not only a blow to
your
family, but to your spiritual family as well. We mourn with you in this
decision. I wanted to write this letter in hopes to encourage you, and
to share with you what God has shown me from my experience.You see, I was the "offender" in my marriage. I was unfaithful. For 10 years I was unhappy, hiding my dissatisfaction about my life and marriage. Eventually the unhappiness lead to my infidelity.
My husband though, resonating God's grace, forgave me, and chose to love me without condition, just as you were determined to do with your husband. I was torn, I knew what was right, but my flesh wanted so badly to be "free" and follow my heart's desires. Being a Christian, I knew what God wanted, but I was fighting my flesh.
At the time, only 5 people on this planet knew our situation, and they were praying for me to come back to the Lord, and to my husband. Only 5 people. But God heard their prayers. I felt the Spirit move inside me, drawing me back to Himself, and I was ready to turn from my sins and repent. Thank God for those 5 people. Thank God for my husband's willingness to forgive, and thank God for Jesus' mercy, grace, and unconditional love! My chains were broken and I was set free. And our life has never been the same. God is so good. Since then I have dedicated my life to following Jesus, and serving the desperate housewife, reminding her of the hope found in Christ.
The reason I tell you this is to encourage you that with only 5 people praying for me, I was able to hear Jesus calling me. The veil was lifted and the chains were broken. It is still possible for this to happen to your husband, especially since you've got a little more than 5 people praying. You have hundreds of thousands people praying, because you are loved by many! Your impact has been great--and now the enemy is trying to derail that. This is a call to arms!
What if, instead of telling us you are pursuing divorce because your husband is unrepentant, you implored us to pray on your behalf? To pray on his behalf? To pray that the God of the miraculous would draw your husband back to Himself? What if you chose to stay with your husband until God unveils his eyes and releases him from the chains of bondage--even if it's until death?
What if you stood up as a wife unwilling to give up on her husband--just as Christ is unwilling to give up on His bride--so that wives everywhere could see a living example of unconditional love in you? When you felt God say, "You've done all you can.." you didn't hear the ending to His sentence. The last part was: "Now let Me do the rest."
Hurting Wife, I implore you, don't give up! I have not walked in your shoes, but I have walked in shoes similar to your husband's, and had my spouse given up on me, I don't know where I'd be today. I don't know who I would be today! But I do know the ripple effect of God's grace in my life never would've happened.
We cheat on Christ everyday. But He promised to love us anyway. Thank God He doesn't divorce us when we break our covenant with Him. I was a Christian wife, going to church on Sundays, praying, and serving others for 10 whole years while hiding my sadness and addiction for male attention. 10 years! Imagine if Christ had left me because I was taking too long to repent? We are called to love like Him. To not give up--no matter how much the other person hurts and betrays us.
Friend, I believe there is an amazing redemption story for you and your husband. It might take 10 weeks, 10 months, or even 10 years, but it will be worth it. I am proof of that. Marriage is the ultimate exercise in becoming more like Christ. We are being asked to love when it's the hardest thing to do. When you feel like your heart is so broken that even God Himself couldn't put it back together. But God allows the brokenness so that He can be the One to put us back together in the image of Him. He is refining you, and you are in the fire right now, and it hurts, but He is with you. Will you let the heat of the flames consume you, or will you continue to fan the flames of His love into your marriage? I know it's hard, but it can be done.
I hope you can see that my heart is for Christ, this letter is not to judge you, but to encourage and challenge you to love your husband like Christ loves you. You have an army of women--more than you could even count--watching and praying for you. Let us stand in the gap for you, let us come on this journey with you as you step out in faith that God will heal your marriage.
There is a miracle waiting to happen for your marriage. How do I know that when I don't even know you?
Because I know God.
And He is the God of miracles.
He is in the business of bringing the dead back to life.
Don't forget that.
I hope this letter makes it's way to you and that the Spirit of the Living God refreshes your heart today. God bless you, you have my prayers.
With love,
Shannon Bishop, just a wife with the faith that God can do ANYTHING!
